By Mack Rights
Please pardon my use of the medical term for courage, but two years ago, Mark Assini still had balls. They’ve been clipped, and he’s been tethered eternally to weak-kneed Democrat-with-a-Republican’s-title Bill Reilich. Back then, the Sally-boys over at the Huffington Post were having coffee-spitting snits about Assini’s appropriate comparison of “political correctness in the classroom to ‘Hitler Youth’ activities in Germany during the run-up to World War II.” Oddly enough, the Huffington Post just compared my favorite gay conservative Milo Yiannopoulos to the infamously gay Nazi leader of Hitler’s SA-Brown Shirts Earnst Rohm without an ounce of shame or irony. Ahh, to have the old Assini- call that my ode to the de-Conservatification of a liberal pretending not to be a perverted baby-killing freak. Unlike Assini, Milo was brilliantly clever in his retort.
In the last week though, Assini has unmasked himself as the crotchety old dude at the end of every Scooby Doo episode complaining that he woulda gotten away with it if it weren’t for those meddling kids.
First, his congressional opponent, Louise “Baby” Slaughter did a commercial complaining about how Assini opposes abortion even in cases where the life of the mother would be in danger.
He quickly groveled before the liberal media crying that she was misunderstanding him. He said that he was only pro-life because he was Catholic. Then he quickly insinuated that it was all a bunch of crap for the morons that might vote for him because, even though he’s pro-life as far as we’re concerned, he agrees with the mindless liberals that Roe vs. Wade is “the law of the land.”
I wonder if Mark Assini is aware that, by running for Congress, he’s running to be a legislator whose job would then be to write laws and to vote for or against laws that other legislators have written. Roe vs. Wade is the name of a case decided by bloodthirsty liberal demigods decked out in black robes who rule from the bench at the Supreme Court. It was never a law passed by legislators that were elected by the people. It’s a decree from the pit of hell issued by unelected megalomaniacal over-educated eugenicists with lifetime appointments to the Supreme Court.
The Supreme Court has been used repeatedly by liberal presidents as a method of overriding the will of the people by neutering the Congress. Pathetic Assini. Pathetic.
What’s the point of wanting to be a Congressman if you’ve already conceded that Congress’ function has been appropriately usurped by the Supreme Court? Have some self-respect man.
Then, later in the week, the other posse on Satan’s payroll busted out the homophobic card on Assini for some jokes he wrote a while back on his blog. According to the Metroweekly, years ago, he wrote some jokes on his blog:
According to the Rochester Democrat & Chronicle, Assini agreed with a reader who called LGBT people “sexual deviants” and quoted a pastor who called transgender individuals “mentally disturbed.” Assini also joked that former U.S. Rep. Barney Frank (D-Mass.) should go to prison, where “Old Barney would have plenty of dates along with three squares and cable TV.”
When Supergay assemblyman Harry Bronson gathered up his homosexual and homophile friends to protest this funny joke, Assini quickly bent over and prostrated himself for their benefit. After hitting his head on the ground, he quickly turned into the biggest homophile in three counties. According to 13Wham.com, this is how he went down- I mean how it went down:
He said at the time, he opposed gay rights and gay marriage. But since then, he said many family members and friends have come out and he realized he no longer felt that way.
He deleted the blog two years after writing it, thinking it was gone. But now, Assini acknowledges he should’ve known it would always be out there.
Assini said he planned to bring it up during campaign debates but is responding now and apologizing because the blog was leaked and he doesn’t want people to think he still has those views.
He said he will not support any amendment to ban gay marriage and insists he does support gay rights.
But Bronson said actions speak louder than words.
He said an apology is good, but said Assini needs to prove his support through actions to support the LGBT community.
Of course, as soon as the Supergay Bronson had asserted that Assini needed to “prove his support through actions,” Assini bent over like a San Francisco bathhouse’s on-staff submissive sex-slave. Again, Assini quickly reminded us that he has no idea what his job as a legislator would be.
To refresh his memory, a legislator writes laws, while the job of the black robes on the Supreme Court is only to interpret laws. “Gay Marriage,” outside of Supergay-Bronson-run New York State, is not “the law of the land.” Like the supposed “law” that allows Hillary and her feminazi sisters to slaughter babies on the altar of “equality,” it is just a decree from unelected judicial oligarchs who need to be put in their place by a Congress that has balls enough to reclaim the Congressional authority to write laws. Assini, in proving to Bronson that he has no balls (again, the medical term for courage), has shown us that he will be a useless addition to the gaggle of gutless Republicans that are already there. I’m not saying he won’t fit in. I’m just saying he’ll be just as useless as the rest of them. Yay- more status quo.
This is what Assini should have said: “Harry Bronson isn’t fit to make laws to which Christians and other good folks must obey. He’s spent the last decade pushing his GENDA bill, which would have made it legal for male perverts, pedophiles and rapists to shower with little girls, young ladies and grown women. Don’t even pretend that isn’t the agenda of a ‘sexual deviant.’ If anyone has anything to apologize for, it is Harry Bronson and anyone who voted for him. Normalization of rape and pedophilia isn’t something any good human can defend. But let him try. Regarding transgenders, they look in the mirror and see themselves as the wrong gender. If I looked at the mirror and saw myself as a lizard, I would indeed be either mentally disturbed or really high. What’s the difference? Regarding Barney Frank, his young boyfriend was running an illegal male prostitution ring out of Barney’s apartment, leaving everyone to assume that Barney likes random dates with random men. Prison is where he belongs, and dates will be easy to come by when he gets there. So he has that going for him, which is nice.”
Instead, Mark Assini apologized and legitimized Harry Bronson as a morally sound human being, even though Bronsom has spent the last decade promoting rape, perversion and pedophilia. Victory never comes through surrender to the demonically inclined.
SO HERE’S MY LESSON ONE
Remember this premise. A real man is someone who is willing to be despised for his principles.
Those principles don’t even have to agree with mine in order for me to appreciate the man. I appreciate Bernie Sanders for his willingness to be despised for his principles, but I don’t agree with much of what he believes. Hillary has no principles and can’t stop lying as a result.
During the last election, Assini ran as a proud and uncompromised conservative Christian. He didn’t get a bathhouse squirt’s worth of help from Corrupt Chairman Bill Reilich the Batman wannabe or any of the local Republican establishment. In case you didn’t know, some believe the reason Reilich owns a Batmobile is that he secretly likes to think of himself as a real-life hero. Regardless, Assini almost beat the “Baby” Slaughter with his bare hands- no bat suit necessary. It was something to behold.
Of course, Bill Reilich quickly tried to take credit for that with which he had nothing to do. Reilich parlayed Assini’s ability to win on principle into becoming the number two guy in the New York State Republican Party. He was even invited to hang out with the then almost-candidate-for-president Rick Perry down in Texas during Perry’s presidential exploration phase.
Maybe the rest of the Republican Party didn’t know that Reilich was worse than useless in Assini’s efforts, but we did. Reilich didn’t lift a finger to help Assini.
This time however, Reilich had to hitch his wagon to Assini. Assini was taken for a walk by our fearless unmasked Batman wannabe, and now look at him. He’s Bronson’s little bathhouse boy. How the mighty have fallen. “May I have another sir? Please, may I have another?”
AND HERE’S MY LESSON TWO
This is a lesson on humor and how to use it in politics.
Let’s agree, humor can be offensive.
Let’s agree, liberals have willingly suppressed their own senses of humor in complete Soviet-style fashion. Name a once-funny liberal comic and I’ll show you the angriest person you’ve ever met. Rosy O’Donnell, for example. She used to be funny. Now she’s the human equivalent of Donald Trump’s drug-resistant jock itch. Don’t laugh. Jock itch is no joke- might even be a reason all these Hillary fan boys want to become Hillary fan girls.
Let’s agree, liberals use the conservative’s sense of humor and ability to laugh at absurdities to destroy the conservative and force the conservative to live in a liberal-designed box like mindless slaves to their totalitarian liberal overlords.
Let’s agree, we shouldn’t let them do that.
Let’s agree, if we willingly give up our right to humorous and offensive free speech, then we have no right to free speech whatsoever.
Assini’s joke about Barney Frank needing to go to jail where he’ll get a lot of dates is funny and offensive, but it’s supposed to be offensive. Barney Frank was using his congressional position to sleep with young men. He even allowed one of those young men to run a gay prostitution business out of his apartment. Because that’s illegal, Barney Frank should have gone to jail. However, because he was a gay congressman, no one wanted to touch him. He might have had AIDS- what, with the parade of young boy prostitutes coming in and out of his apartment. The idea that he’d get a lot of dates in prison is nothing more than an acknowledgement that there is a larger percentage of gays in prison than in regular population. This is true. Man on man rape is a major problem in prisons as a result. That’s not a secret liberals. It’s a fact.
So Assini’s joke was funny because it had a sense of truth in it. If there was nothing true about it, it wouldn’t be funny. It would just be a stupid non-sequitur with the stink of a child acting out.
Assini’s joke was also offensive, but it was supposed to be offensive. Barney Frank was and is a liberal commie ‘sexual deviant’ who has supported every form of deviancy to which he’s ever been introduced. In Massachusetts, he makes the Kennedy boys seem like choir boys. There should be no shame in offending him. He’d more quickly call you a racist bigot homophobe for disagreeing with him than he’d accept a free meal for having been a Congressman, and that says something. The dude loves to eat, and the dude loves spending other people’s money.
Just as Frederick Douglass was justified in stealing himself away from his slave owner because slavery is despicable, offending our liberal overlords, who’d force us to choose between obeying a Supreme Court decree from the pit of hell that purposely violates God’s law in order to offend God, is completely justified. The liberal ruling class is vile, and so are all of its ideas. That might be offensive to some, but, since it’s true, too bad.
Liberals are vomitus masses of de-souled flesh who define their lives by the sins they commit as a symbolic middle-fingered gesture to the heavens. We must remember that Satan was the original bisexual fiend for flesh. He conceitedly traded favor with God for his own kingdom of perversion. Criticism, judgement and mockery may be the only things we have left to make our liberal friends see the light that will guide them off their paths to hell.
Nonetheless, the left will say that Assini’s joke also offends those who support Barney Frank. Duh. It’s supposed to. If blind followers of a guy, who facilitates the subjugation of young boys into gay prostitution and who takes money made from the slaughter of babies in the form of campaign donations, aren’t allowed to be offended, how the heck are they ever going to discover that they shouldn’t be those blind followers?
The left’s desire to destroy the right’s willingness to use humor to undermine the left is nothing more than the left’s attempt to disarm us. Not only are they trying to take our guns, they are trying to take away our ability to laugh at their absurd view of life and everything that’s important. When we willingly give up our guns, we are unarmed and easier to kill. When we willingly give up our ability to use humor to laugh at our incredibly mock-worthy liberal adversaries, we too often end up accepting their premise that we are nothing but homophobic racist sexist bigots.
Because liberals have willingly destroyed their own ability to be humorous without sounding like angry feces-flinging children in the playpen prison of their own making, they want to handicap us by taking away our ability to laugh at them. When we let them write the rules, we lose.
However, when we laugh at how weak and un-American they’ve allowed themselves to become, we vanquish them and remind them of how absurdly useless they’ve made themselves to the furtherance of humanity. Humanity cannot carry on when humans refuse to procreate or when they kill their babies in the womb. Abortion and homosexuality are two of the great sacraments of the liberals’ pagan religion of Satan-directed dirt worship. They deserve no respect because they’ve earned none. That might be offensive, but it’s true.
Now, I’m not telling you not to vote for Assini. I don’t think what the NeverTrumpers are doing is right, and I’m not NeverAssini. I just hope that Assini will be reminded of what made him such a great candidate in the last election. Hillary and “Baby” Slaughter were spawned from the same wretched hell slime as Hitler, Stalin and Mao. Sorry Hitler, Stalin and Mao, it’s true, you guys are no better than Hillary and “Baby” Slaughter- two of the most powerful forces behind the global socialist movement’s genocide of abortion and slaughter of the inconvenients through right-to-die “assisted suicide”-labeled government murder schemes. Even though the fact that these two queen bees of death have stolen your arguments for socialistic-government-funded genocide and are therefore no where near as creative as you all, you three monsters of history are no better than they are. Preventing Hillary’s ascension is akin to preventing Satan from claiming his seat at the White House.
I don’t know why God put Trump in charge of preventing that from happening, but I have enough faith to believe He knows what He’s doing (the “He’s” with a capital H refer to God, not Trump). I just hope that my thoughts here remind Mark Assini of what he’s really up against. Louise “Baby” Slaughter is older than Yoda, and the only reason she stays alive is that she gets fetal blood transfusions from the Planned Parenthood baby-body-parts market. If you look closely at some of the cracks upon her face that look as though they were carved with the sharpened scythe of the Grim Reaper’s 12-inch action figure, you will see rivers of hardened baby blood that didn’t make it down her gullet at her most recent visit to Planned Parenthood. That may sound like an unfunny joke, but it’s actually not funny because it’s not a joke. It’s true.
Bottom line, we have no heavenly reason whatsoever to ever apologize to these godforsaken people. They kill babies, and they aid and abet pedophiles and rapists.
My message to Mark Assini is this: Please Mark, get off your knees and stand up like a man who’s willing to be despised for his Godly principles. Reclaim your manhood from the AIDS quilters. Because you used to be that man, you almost won. Now that you hang around with Captain Corrupt, the deluded Batman wannabe chairman of the GOP, you and Harry Bronson have matching moral compasses. The arrows are pointing towards hell- how GQ.